My friend, JaRon Snow died last Wednesday. She was my age, mother of three, wife of a godly man and the only child of our beloved Grammy J. There really is no way to make sense out of it, even though we saw it coming. Cancer is an ugly thing, and it has taken yet another one of my dear friends. I hate that she had to suffer and I wonder if that isn't God's way of making it easier to say goodbye, because we all wanted her to be free from the pain.
Her family is doing about as well as any family can be doing at such a time as this. I stepped into my get-it-done role and offered to write her eulogy, gather old photos and turn it into a slide show production. I've been consumed for days on end with this process and thanks to other very skilled friends, it's now done. They are techno geniuses and I couldn't have done it without them. It's a tribute that captures her essence and portraits her life in a very down to earth way. I'm proud of it, even though I would do a thousand things differently if I had time to do it over again. At some point we just have to move on and say it's the best we can do, given the circumstances.
We've spent the last ten years worth of Thanksgivings with the Snows around our dining room table. I'm not sure what this year will bring, but we must be thankful nonetheless. We can be thankful that someday we will join her in heaven, we can be thankful that God gave her 12 years in which to raise her kids after her initial diagnosis of breast cancer, before it spread into her bones. We can be thankful we were part of her life and she a part of ours. But it won't be the same, this Thanksgiving, or any that follow. My heart just aches.
I haven't done a good job of maintaining normal life this past week. We've all been a little off. Kaleb has been doing nothing but math for ten days straight, trying to finish up his Johns Hopkins math class before his time expired last Saturday. I offered him a profit sharing bonus if he was able to complete it, as it would have cost nearly seven hundred dollars to finish it if he didn't meet the deadline, so he's been doing math night and day and finished an entire half of the 3 month course in just one week. It was material he already knew, but he needed to review it before he went on to Honors Algebra. The course was set up so that he had to do all the exercises before he could take the chapter tests, so he had a lot of calculations to figure out and he got pretty rummy there toward the end. Monday and Tuesday he just did the final exam, once and then twice, rechecking his answers. I get tired just watching him.
This past weekend I attended a training class on healing prayer. There is a group from our church that want to get a prayer team together so we all needed to be on the same page in terms of how to go about it. Another pastor from a local Covenant church taught it, so we all went, and were blessed by the process. We have two more weekends to attend before we are officially commissioned as prayer warriors, but I certainly won't wait for that to start praying. Actually, most of what was taught, I already knew, but it was still time well spent and it's exciting to see how many people want to deepen their prayer life at our church.
Apparently the extra blood now flowing through Kory's heart hasn't helped his ability to think clearly – either that or his head is just so hard the blood can't go there no matter what. He was told by his cardiologist to lay low for three days after his stents were put in, not lift anything, and take it easy for about a week. After the week was over, he could then start to slowly exercise and get back in shape. Well, against doctor's advice and a screaming wife, he decided after just two days at home he was feeling so good he thought he'd go for a brisk walk and see if he could bring on any angina. He also lifted some heavy saws and wood and started working on projects. Up to that point, the place where they inserted the needle in his leg was nearly invisible, with no bruising or swelling, but of course, after his brisk walk and all that lifting, he did some damage. I think he jostled the plug out of place and his thigh turned black and swelled up with all the blood that was spurting around under his skin. What was he thinking? I thought I would have to take him to the ER but we called the consulting nurse, and she said he had to lie down and put ice and pressure on it. She also told him he wasn't supposed to be that active, and I heard him say something like, “You sound like my wife...” The next day I could see the bleeding had stopped and the blood was diffusing, but I couldn't get him off the couch for a week. It scared him a little, but I'm sure it won't do much regarding his ability to listen to his wife.
A few days ago he started putting a new wood floor down in our upstairs kitchen, which is light work since I'm doing all the heavy lifting. The man goes crazy without a thing to do. While I appreciate his efforts, and his need to “surprise” me with this project, I question the timing of it right before the holidays – since our upstairs is now a complete wreck and I can’t even get to my auxiliary refrigerator, which I desperately need right now.
But Kory has his good points and while he was lying down recovering from his bleeding leg, he read a book I bought him last year on how to paint watercolors. Previously he’s only done line drawings, so one day this past week he picked up all the supplies that he needed to do his first water color, which ended up being very professional looking and I'm most impressed. He just read in a book how to do it and sat down one night and did it. (See photo of the photo I took he worked from and the water color he made from it below). That man is talented, and not just in his many ways to infuriate me. It helps balance the part of him that's difficult to live with.
That’s what’s new in our world. No one said life was going to be easy.
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